Do you want to get married, or run away?

Fortunately the answer was get married! We are engaged. YAY!

I had a great birthday and am now the owner of a funky University of Sheffield dressing gown and cool camo shorts. My parents also gave me a salt grinder and Karen some stickers and marking pens for next year, how cute!!

Currently I am in limbo with all my stuff at Karen's and waiting to go to Morocco tomorrow!! I can't wait, massively excited. I am charging up all my camera gear as I type. =P We fly on Friday morning and probably will miss our results being put up but ho hum, I am 100% sure that both Karen and I will meet our offers and will hopefully do very well anyway.

I have had a nice couple of weeks here in Sheffield doing very little with my beloved (although now I should start calling her fiancee, weird!!). Tonight we are going out for pizza and to see the new Transformers film (Yaayyyy!). Tomorrow is final trip home for all of Karen's stuff and we get to see "Mum in law" and "Chippa in law" before we travel down to Heathrow.

Its been a great three years in Sheffield, and I am really sad it has to end. But I know that we will be back here someday, the opportunity would be too good to miss.

Who let the dogs out...

I slept for about 9 hours last night. Not lots I know but it certainly helped me catch up after only five hours of sleep the night before. In the shower I was listening to the radio and it was talking about a veterinary nurse who couldn't bear to see unwanted dogs put down (rightly so!) and so turned her home into a sanctuary for stray dogs. Apparently she now has about 38! Now a few years ago I would have baulked at that number and been horrified, however today I thought she was a saint and that I would emulate her if given the chance. Well maybe not me per se but my house for doggies! And maybe not 38, something like 6 would probably be more than enough. But its a lot more than I previously thought!

Its a sunny day so I may have a wander down to the wetlands area and see what I can spot after lunch. I took photos in Durham yesterday, but I'm not particularly happy with any of them, I would like to blame the sky but unfortunately its more likely that my own skills and creativity that are lacking. In other photography related news I am going to become a professional heelwork to music photographer and make millions (of half pennies ;~) to fund Karen's expensive dog habit (=P).

I did a lot of looking in town but nothing really took my fancy so didn't actually buy anything! Ah well. Feels like lunchtime now, even though I only had breakfast an hour ago (counterfeit crunchy nut cornflakes).

This one last bullet you mention is my one last shot at redemption...

I feel pretty drained, which I guess isn't too surprising considering its twenty to one in the morning. I'm trying to stay awake to watch some of game 6 of the Stanley Cup finals. I'm not sure whether I'll make it as faceoff isn't until one. I'm glad I'm at home but still wish I was back in Sheffield; life seems to be much less complicated when Karen and I are together and able to talk properly. I ate more cake earlier; it was a snail cake and was mega tasty! I'm rather looking forward to getting stuck into a new project and a new challenge next year. I just hope that my relationships will be as strong as they are now in twelve months time. I feel really attached to Karen. We've spent two and a half years knowing each other and my university career to date is exclusively intertwined with her. That's something that I don't want to change or give up on. I want things to work, and I am determined to make them work. I don't want this opportunity to be happy to pass me by.

Since finishing exams on Friday I haven't really done much, which suits me fine. I went into town and met Karen, we then had lots of fun out in Bia Hoi eating tasty Thai tapas and drinking funky cocktails! Saturday was slightly more hectic as I managed to pack up pretty much all of my room for dad to take home on Sunday. We went out to eat at ASK which was much nicer than I remembered and I would definitely go back and eat more cheesecake because it was amazing!

Sunday was my fake birthday party, we had a wet BBQ and played Taboo. I really enjoyed having people round to my house and am slightly disappointed that I hadn't done it before! Maybe next year I shall invite more people over when Karen comes to visit. I now own 14 sausages to eat before I leave for London but I do like a challenge! I think a giant toad in the hole is called for. I also have an obscene amount of pasta and spaghetti to get rid of. Some tuna and a lasagne. Its going to be a fat two weeks when I get home. =P

Maybe that's what I need as I'm not too sure what food I am going to eat in Morocco for two whole weeks. Apart from the nourishment based issue I am really looking forward to experiencing another culture, seeing a totally different landscape and spending two weeks with Karen in another continent! I'm a bit nervous regarding the camel ride as I'm not the greatest fan of heights (camels are really tall!) and haven't ever been horse riding. It could be an interesting and potentially bum numbing few hours on my trusty steed! Hopefully I will be able to take my camera on the camel to get some interesting pictures! I really want to get some good shots to make large prints and put them on my wall, hopefully I shall take some great photos of Karen and I because I love using them as bookmarks. Its really cute to see her sweet little face every time I open a book. =)

I think we should be close to opening faceoff at the Mellon arena so I'm going to snuggle down in bed and try not to fall asleep too soon so I can at least see some of the game!

I've been locked inside this house with all my insecurities, and I've been trying to get out and all the while you hold the key...

I am halfway through my final exams ever (hopefully!). I have two more to go, one on Monday, which I am dreading, and one on Friday which I am almost looking forward to. I cannot wait to be free to do the million things I've not been able to do for weeks now! I want to stay up late and get up later, go to the park and play in the sun, take a ridiculous number of photos and eventually edit them and most of all I want to spend every moment of every day with my beloved!

Karen finishes on Monday the lucky so and so. But more importantly she's going puppying tomorrow. I hope that this little guy is a good fit for her and her mum (and Chippa actually!), as I think it would be really really beneficial for Karen to be there at the start of the house-training regime sort of thing. Mostly in preparation for our own little pup but also to help her mum. =P

I am shattered, even though today I have eaten more chocolate and drank some Co-op brand red bull I'm really looking forward to sleeping tonight. Hopefully I can get up nice and early and have a bash at a bit more revision before church tomorrow. I'm going to stop by Karen's for puppy day hugs yay! I shall also take my camera and hopefully get some good wide angle shots of outside the church.

Anyway off to bed for me!

Opinions are immunity to being told you're wrong...

I went to church today and listened to Ben and Rick speak about growing fruit from your relationship with God and that bad things in your life will be pruned away if you ask God for help. I feel like a bit of pruning, particularly in my devotion of time would be very much appreciated!

Tuesday is my first exam (oh to be able to cut that out of my life =P) and I'm nervous yet not too scared, I feel ok and hope that a good question comes up. Doing the external reading of some funky papers has been way more useful than the lecture notes I made. Maybe I'm now getting to grips with reading for my degree, ah well better late than never.

I'm processing a few HDRs (my new favourite photography play thing), I really like the effect although it does make me want a tripod to try out night time shots. This summer I hope to get some really good photos of Chippa, probably in the Lakes as I think I may have to get good at dog shots for the future. =P I'd also like to have a real good go at some landscapes in the Lakes, I may even climb a mountain to pursue such an idea!

I'm really feeling attached to Sheffield at the moment, maybe its because I will be leaving for my MRes. I feel very connected with church and the general atmosphere, I didn't quite anticipate this when applying four years ago. I really hope I can come back here for some if not all of my life...

We control the chaos, at the back of our minds...

Now everything is handed in and revision is in full swing. I have had a nap today which was rather pleasant and went to the gym with Karenstickalaren. I am currently printing out notes, all 28 pages of sex and reproduction.

I'm feeling pretty drained and really can't wait for the year to end, although its scary that it will be over so soon! I found out that I got my first choice accommodation site yesterday so I will be in a good place, near the department and the gym which is cool! I am beginning to get a bit more excited about next year now that I can feel it getting closer. Hopefully I will have a good relax in the summer and not be moving around too much so I'm not overwhelmed by snails next year.

I don't really have anything else to write as all I do is coursework and revise now which isn't fantastic! I could blog about cooperation and conflict or sex and reproduction but I don't think I could actually write much. Doesn't bode well for next week eh?

And sometimes I think that I'm not any good at all, and sometimes I wonder why I'm even here at all, but then you assure me...

I am up waiting for an email of my dissertation feedback which I may or may not finally receive today. I'm not impressed at all with the timing. Hopefully I will have to email the correct people and tell them to bin my angry email, also any feedback I eventually do get will say its fine nothings wrong.

The exam and coursework deadline based panic is in full swing at the moment. Exams start a week tomorrow but at least I will be in nice exam halls that are close to uni. Revision is ok and preferable to being sat in front of the computer all day. I can't wait until its all over, only 17 days to go! I hope I don't mess up an exam.

Anyway onto more important stuff. Karen is getting a new puppy, so I now have the perfect excuse to buy MORE camera gear. In other words, I'm really pleased, I can't wait to see her get far too excited about the poor little thing. Hopefully Chippy will be ok with the little cutie too! I hope I get to help name it as well, I think that would be fun although it may make me look like a less eligible son-in-law if my contributions are hilarious (which they no doubt will be!).

I have just got my feedback section. Hallelujah. Shame its Tuesday.

I want to stay at home for the end of the world, falling asleep when their dropping the bomb...

Its so so near to the end. Everyone can feel it coming but no one is there yet. The cycle of wake, revise, eat, revise, eat, sleep has begun. I can remember feeling like I wanted to escape around this time in year 13. It seems very weird that I could ever think about getting out of here, but I am really looking forward to finishing. I wonder if it would be different if I were doing the level four course instead of being nervous about making friends in a new place next year?

I applied for accommodation yesterday, I went for a large single room in Broadgate Park as my first choice. Sadly my parents weren't prepared to pay just under £6k for a studio room which is a shame although understandable I guess. =P Now I am worried about not getting on with my flat mates as I wasn't asked any personality questions like when I applied for undergrad. I'm looking forward to taking the year and getting ready for a PhD, I really hope I can do what I want. Its going to be tough work wise let alone being away from Karen. Fortunately we should see each other every weekend which will be good.

We are putting off thinking about exams, coursework and dissertation by finalising our holiday arrangements in Morocco. Changing money seems like a pain but we can't do it until we are in Morocco which I guess will be fine. The hotel we are staying in looks cool, even better is that its next to a mega expensive one so we can sneak in and use their pool, tehe. I can't wait to go, its going to be a whole new culture, probably a bit of a shock really! Hopefully we will meet some really great people and have an unforgettable experience. I'm looking forward to taking photos to document our adventures. I will do my best not to get carried away and make the most of seeing things with my own eyes not through a camera lens though.

I'm going to bed now, absolutely shattered and have to be up to have another crack at my BMS revision tomorrow. =S

And I'm racking my brain for a new improved way to let you know your more to me than what I know how to say...

It has been forever since I blogged and a lot has happened in the past few days. I got rejected by Oxford last Saturday meaning I am off to Nottingham next year to do and MRes. I went to meet my supervisor and find out a bit more of what I was going to be doing. I had a really good time, it was a beautiful day and the snails were a lot cooler than Littorina =P. I think I want to work on why snails show handedness or the evolution of chirality which will require a lot of reading this summer! I managed to have a look in the city centre due to a bus stop based mishap, which wasn't a bad thing!

I found out I was got an award for my contribution to the hockey club on Wednesday which was really humbling as I don't really think I did much! I was only enhancing my own portfolio. =P

This week has been coursework and dissertation which are almost finished bar redrafting and final editing. I'm so pleased that the majority of the work is over so I can get down to revision as I'm not feeling too confident about my BMS stuff.

Karen and I have been finalising our trip to Morocco and have booked trains to and from Heathrow and a hotel for when we get back with a giant buffet breakfast which will be AWESOME. I really like breakfast. I'm really excited about going now, I can't wait to experience all these new things with Karen and I hope to take some good photos with my new lens (Sigma 10-20) which is an early birthday present from my parents. I hope the weather is good tomorrow so I can have a play with it. Karen is thinking about getting a new compact camera which is exciting because new toys always are! There is however one tiny snag; there are a million compact cameras to choose between and none of them are perfect.

In other news Jiri Hudler has just scored a very skillful/lucky (delete as appropriate) goal to give the Wings a 2-0 lead against the Ducks in the Western Conference semi finals.

I hope to have my dissertation sorted by this weekend and handed in on Monday and then panic revision can ramp up in earnest. I also want to cook tasty tasty Simon potato's for Karen to follow up the amazing pasta bake I cooked last night!

We are the pirates who don't do anything, we just stay at home and lie around...

I have discovered spotify, and am listening to various thing such as HIM, AFI, Veggietales and Reliant K. Its pretty cool although I did get an advert warning me about unprotected sex which was a rather unexpected!

Friday went OK, I initially felt ok about it, then rubbish and now I feel OK again as I didn't receive and email today or Monday rejecting me straight off so I can't have been that bad. The day went rather smoothly really, I managed to get my train fine although I was sat listening to Dora the blooming Explorer for two hours! I met Haydn and I looked around Jesus college which was a really cool rabbitywarreny building. Very stereotypcially Oxbridge college. I also managed to find St Hilda's college which, from what I saw, was filled with feminists! Apparently they only started admitting men to the college last year so I appear to have perhaps picked the wrong college! Anyway I enventually found the plant sciences department and waited in the, very wooden, reception area. I was interviewed by Prof HG Dickinson, Dr SA Harris, Dr IR Moore and Dr AS Hay. They started off by asking about why I wanted to do a PhD and specifically at Oxford, unfortunatley I had to explain why I had applied so late which was a bummer but couldn't be helped. Then we spoke about the paper I was given to read, this was probably the worst bit, I spent a few question in silence just trying to figure out what to say before having to ask for it to be rephrased. It probably wasn't as disasterous as I thought but it was very uncomfortable at the time. Next we spoke about my Littorina project, again not a great topic of conversation for me! I think my grasp of the subject wasn't quite up to the standard they were probably looking for but I guess you never know. It didn't feel like 45 minutes but it definitely was by the time I left! I was briefly asked about my dissertation which I felt I answered very well and sounded enthusiastic about after being a tad resolute about my project. It was good to leave on a positive note. The train back was fine (no Dora!) and Karen came and met me in town where we went and had Thai tapas and cocktails at Bia Hoi which was really tasty! I now like thai food as well as Chinese, oh how cultural I am!

Today I got confirmation of my offer from Nottingham, I need a 2.2 at the end of this year. So that is going to be definitely acheivable as a back up. I am now a whole lot more positive about what's going to happen compared to a month ago and am now really looking forward to moving on in my academic career, I know its going to be difficult being apart from Karen but I genuinely think we'll be able to make it work because we really want to do it! I have absolute faith in our relationship. Karen asked me what I felt had changed in the past year, from a God conversation at church, I feel that our relationship has moved forward in leaps and bounds. We are even closer than before and are seriously considering our future together rather than just (cutely) joing about it. Things are so much better.

You are a force, you are a constant source, Yeah you are a shining light...

I have my Oxford interview tomorrow. I'm very very nervous. I really hope I give a good account of myself and that I manage to look spiffing in my suit.

I've been really busy the past few weeks, what with being at Karen's, then the Lake District, then at home, and finally back in Sheffield working so haven't really got round to blogging. I'm feeling a lot better about pretty much everything since the last time I wrote. I have an offer (of some sort!) for an MRes at Nottingham, had a job interview on Monday and now my PhD one tomorrow. Its all been go go go! I managed to acquire a suit and new shoes which I look rather dashing in. I took some pretty good HDR photos in the Lakes and Chippa now thinks I am interesting to follow when going for walks! I had a great time at home with my parents and little bro and actually got a large amount of work done whilst I was there. I came back to Sheffield and have been so relaxed and feeling fantastic now that I am reunited with Kazz that work seems to be getting easier, especially finding out I will definitely be somewhere next year! I haven't heard from Edinburgh or Manchester but I'm not really fussed now I have something good and I am going to make the most of it!

Carpe diem my friends!

Mr Sandman showing his beam, when he walks into the room the walls lean in to listen...

I am at home for the next week in an attempt to get well and get some work done. Its been a pretty hectic couple of weeks. First was the last week of term before Easter, Varsity week and various goings out! I shot the Women's 2's, Men's s'3, Women's 1's and Men's 1s hockey over the course of the week and managed to get four or five shots published in the Forge Press which I am very proud of. I'd love to turn this into a paying hobby to do at the weekends, as I really feel that I am improving immensely. We went to the pub on the Thursday and it was good to see everyone before we all disappeared for Easter, sadly there won't be too many nights free to meet up in the next month or so due to the final push for dissertations and revision. Fortunately my exams are spaced nicely and I'll be done by the 5th of June so will have loadses of time to sort out Morocco stuff and have a great time with Karen and the rest of the gang.

We had a great couple of days in the Lakes, a wonderful walk up to High Dam with Chippa! I took a reasonable amount of photos and should eventually get round to editing them once I have got Crufts and Varsity out of the way. On the Wednesday we went to Bowness and Windermere and had an ice cream, super tasty! Then we went to Lakeland and bought some really exciting salt. Why yes I am a student and do lead the most typical student life, not. It doesn't matter what I do, no matter how mundane or boring it may seem, as long as it is with Karen I genuinely don't care because it makes me so happy. On Thursday we went to Holker and stalked deer, I really need a longer lens, and a wide angle and a tripod (hehe :~). Once we got back to Preston we went to dog class and I was interrogated as usual and had cake, it was pretty good cake but my cake was way better in my and Karen's opinion, plus mine was far more calorific, a key point int judging cakes. We spent a lot of time playing on Professor Layton and the Mysterious village, which we eventually completed the storyline for. It was pretty good, and its fun to do stuff together like that! I was taken show shopping on Friday as I need some shiney shiney shoes for the ball and various other engagements. I really don't like shoe shopping, I don't see what's wrong with my Merrells. =P I didn't struggle too much but I'll sort it out on my own soon enough.

I found out that I have an interview at Oxford a week on Friday which is absolutely terrifying. I have booked train tickets for my day trip and will heopefully have the chance to explore Oxford and take some photos too. Its going to be an interesting experience and hopefully it will go better than my Cambridge interview for undergrad! I'd really like to get this PhD, to be setteled for the next three years would be great for us, Karen would have somewhere to direct job searching after her PGCE year and I'd be very very proud of myself. I also got contacted by a professor and Nottingham who linked my application to his lab, if I definitely got an offer from there I and not Oxford I'd take it in a shot. Whilst people have spoken against a masters I genuinely think it would be difficult for me to enter the job market and then as Dr Graves said it may be difficult to lift myself from a technicians job to a PhD although I don't know for sure. At least things are going in the right direction for the time being.

Talk, talking a lot, but it's still talk, gotta love how it's somehow all on me...

Today is Sunday and I am recovering from a hectic weekend.

On Friday it was Karen's birthday and she loved her present even though it didn't look all that impressive! It's a convenient excuse to have to come and see her that weekend which is perfect :~). We went for a walk in the peak district, from Hathersage up to Stanage Edge and down to Lodge Moor. It was a great walk, not as pretty as in the snow, but we did have hail and it only took us three hours compared to six the previous time. I took numerous photos, mostly HDR's to get the clouds and shall hopefully find some time to reinstall paintshop pro and edit them. That evening we had various alcoholic products and played pictionary whilst eating cake. Truly a winning combination! Karen, Chris and I won which was fun although had we played once the bottle of red wine had taken its toll on Chris it may have been a different story. Whilst not everyone came for a variety of excuses I still had a great time! In fact the only person I felt that was missing was Tom who was ill unfortunately. Yesterday I worked when I eventually got home and then watched Ghostworld at Karen's, truly a WEIRD film. It didn't really end. I still don't understand why it was called Ghostworld even after reading IMBD and Wiki today.

Church was good, I think we really got through to some of the kids this morning and playing I went to the shops and bought... was hilarious. I am hopefully going to the Easter party to take photos on Friday which shall be another fun little project for me (as if I don't have enough to do =P). I spoke to Dan and Ellen about my predicament regarding next year and they were really supportive and helpful. They heavly suggested going for PhD's which is positive in that they know its still possible to get them this year but confusing as I think I still want to do a masters so I have a bit more time to plan a PhD application session! I suppose that there is no time like the present and just going for it may be what is meant to happen.

This afternoon I tried to read some books about my dissertation stuff but nearly fell asleep then I made an amazing omelette with bacon, peppers and onion. This evening I got distracted by watching the updates on the ice hockey, which was suitably nail biting and disappointing in equal measures. At least next weekend I get to enjoy the hockey without the stress of caring who wins (apart from the Steelers =P). I think I shall be welsh and support Cardiff as everybody loves an underdog.

I am looking forward to Easter as a break from being in Sheffield which is associated with work and a tinge of disappointment. The Lake district is always fun whatever the weather, Karen and I always keep ourselves amused. Then I get to spend time at home for a week which will be much needed, I like being cooked for, and I shall hopefully get cracking on my dissertation. Then I shall come back to Sheffield and get some work done before my final term starts. Maybe by then I will know a bit more about what is happening next year...

Why do I have to fly over every town up and down the line...

I am currently looking at a variety of border collies attempting to pick out my favourite thus condemning myself to another type of dog that we're going to have!

I have spent five hours on the internet today, no wonder work goes so slowly. I really really need to decrease the amount of time I spent procrastinating, its genuinely worrying me. I'm pretty worried about next year now, I really want to get onto a masters course and give myself a much better idea of what I want to do for a PhD but I am scared I won't make it. At least Karen is definitely going to be in Sheffield next year which is great for her. There's not much I can do about it now short of apply for as much as possible and hope and pray!

We are planning Easter at the moment, I am super excited about going to the lakes and getting some peace and quiet away from city life. Getting up early and walking the dog, taking too many photos and eating lots of tasty tasty foodies! Then I get to spend a week or two at home and do such fun activities like going to the dentist and playing on guitar hero. Karen will be coming to visit which is great, I really like going out and about in Durham with her, I find places that I haven't explored before, mostly coffee shops but I like cake so it's hunky dory!

This Friday it is Karen's birthday and I need to finish sorting out her present. I am also making an AMAZING cake on Thursday which is a super secret design, photos will be posted. I may set up my camera on timer mode (so, so sad!). We're hopefully going for a walk in the peaks on Friday which will be great if the weather is good and a pub tea is always a winner in my eyes. =P

I finally finished reading the New Testament last night so will start the Old and see if I can get through it in less than 6 months. I've really enjoyed doing the reading so far, its given me many hopeful and reassuring thoughts.

I should really go to bed soon as I need to be up bright and early ready for dissertation reading.

Some sort of window to your right, as he goes left and you stay right...

Quick little blog today. Its been a gorgeous day and I am looking forward to having a little walk in a bit to take pasta bake stuff to Karenstickalaren's. I am going to a meeting about Varsity photography, hopefully I shall get to cover the hockey! I can't decide how fussed I am about covering anything else really, maybe some lacrosse would be good but thats probably about it.

We're going out for Julie's birthday tonight which I am actually really looking forward to, hope its fun. We shall be going to Space for possibley the last time which is actually quite sad. I am still yet to accept that I will actually be leaving in June although I will still be able to come back and visit Karen. I'm getting nervous about my applications now as I sent a couple of masters ones off yesterday.

Anyway now I need to find some smart shoes and trousers!

Nobody plans to be half a world away at times like these, so I sat alone and waited out the night...

I think I have blogger's block! Having made it to the magic 100 posts last week, my attention span has dwindled slightly. I shall hopefully be able to pick up in the near future to chronicle my trials and tribulations as I finish my undergraduate degree here at Sheffield.

I had a really good weekend at home, I took some pretty good photos of JB in action for his last game for DCHC which was enjoyable. I really like it when people like my photos. I sometimes have a sneak around facebook and see who's using photos I've taken as profile pictures and its occasionally rewarding. I'd love to turn my serious hobby into a little money earner one day. Maybe I'll get my chance, however as long as I am still enjoying taking photos I don't mind.

I am still in limbo regarding what challenges, both academic (hopefully!) and photographic, await next year. I am really liking the idea of a masters course I think as it will give me more experience, some more letters after my name, and a bit more of an insight into academia, which is where I would really like to stay. Whilst I'd have a hard time turning down a PhD offer from Oxford I'd have to have a serious think about what I really want to do, and equally importantly what's best for Karen and I.

I am scared of what happens if M has to bail on K and T, as its another thing that we really couldn't do with at the moment. Its very difficult to feel that there is a direction for any of us to go in at times like these but perseverence is key and new opportunities are worthwhile. I think I would like to end up in Nottingham as it'd be a whole lot easier for staying in close contact with Karen plus having C and J there would probably help me settle in to a new place.

My weight has decided to climb again, silly not being able to eat what I want. I shall go to the gym tomorrow and have an intense cardio session, maybe even 20 mins of running and biking! I want to get some weights I think, as Karen likes my arms when they are a bit more toned. Maybe I should buy something really heavy to lug about with me, such as a massive diamond ring, or a camera lens, or a dog!

One day Bertolli and fear of bears shall be shared...

Windmill, windmill for the land, love forever hand in hand...

Today has been a good day, despite not getting marked up (or down!) for any of my work in the autumn semester I have enjoyed myself.

A nice lie in (I really need an automatic blind opener device) and BMS lecture set me up perfectly for the day. I did a bit more of my Edinburgh and Nottingham applications before meeting Karen for a lunch based rendezvous. We had tasty food in City View, which I am really going to miss next year, and then bought biology ball tickets. This year its in the Winter Gardens so hopefully it will be amazing, I'm really looking forward to it! Hopefully everyone important will get a ticket.

We went and worked in the library this afternoon which was surprisingly productive, I even took a book out! Its really strange wandering around the totally silent, dark and musty stacks of books in the oldy worldy setting of the library compared to the noisey, light and pleasent smelling shelves in the IC. In a way I much prefer the library as it reminds me of a time when education wasn't controlled by the internet and everything was done by print. Whilst I don't ever want to have to any work like that (a PhD thesis would be killer!), its still a vaguely nostaglic thought. If I get into Oxford then I look forward to having a rustic and characterful library to nose around and pretend to be Harry Potter in!

Tonight I cooked an amazing tea - rich creamy cheese tomatoey sauce with sausage chunks, onions and peppers with pasta. Super super tasty! I have been getting on with my dissertation which is by far and away more exciting than either of my courseworks. I even ordered a book online!

Now I am off to Karens to deliver some pineapple juice and passata in exchange for a cuddle! =P

PS This is my 100th blog post! Hurrah! ^_^

I've got a funny feeling we're all born to lose...

Cheer up!

This week has been rather up and down to say the least but I feel a whole lot better now than Monday so I am going to focus on the positives and make sure that I take full advantages with any good opportunities that I am presented with!

I had a chat with Dr Graves on Thursday and he has convinced me to apply for PhDs as I am very determined to go into research; so I am looking at a few and the one which catches my eye most is at Oxford. Typical. I love doing things the hard way eh! I am also looking at master's courses and jobs to keep my options open and to avoid my dissertation which is scaring the crap out of me at the moment!

I am really sad that I will be leaving Sheffield actually, that's what's the most disappoint thing about the whole turn of events. I really felt like I belonged here with Karen and at this great church in such a wonderful community but apparently I am needed elsewhere. How perplexing.

Anyway, yesterday at the ungodly time of 6:30am I was awoken by Dashboard and eventually we got up ready for a fun packed day at Crufts! Now as a recently converted dog person I was excited but a little scared of what the day would bring, but two train journeys, four cobs and 530 photos later I was knackered but very happy at a good day!

We made it to the train station on time and spent the journey listening to some Leeds fans who were travelling down to Bristol (I think!) for the match. Between 8 and 9am they had had 3 cans of lager/ale each, a liquid breakfast indeed!

We arrived at the NEC after some great running between trains at New Street and missing the opportunity for an M&S smoothy! Once in the main hall it was my camera out and Karen 's giant grin out our cutest voices on for any puppy spotting! We came across two of the biggest dogs I have ever seen being walked around, I swear they were horses honest! There was ltos of information about the genetic testing dog breeders do/should do which was interesting from my nosey biological point of view. We wandered around and saw the cutest border terriers ever. We have now decided that this will be our first dog (which I am very secretly really looking forward to!) and moved on to more cuteness! We saw some Portuguese Podengos which Karen got to hug and very nearly ran off with one! After being overwhelmed with all the things you can buy for your pampered pooch (you can get hair dryers that look like ray guns!) we headed for the arena for the Eukanuba small team agility and international HTM where my memory card would take one hell of a battering in the few hours that we were sat there!

I really wish I had turned my noise reduction off earlier in the day as it really made a difference in the sharpness of my photos. The agility was impressive and the small dogs were hilarious. The HTM was great I really enjoyed it, very entertaining and obviously technically challenging. We spotted Anne and her crowd cheering for every single competitor (well almost ;). I was particularly impressed with the Czech girl who did a cowgirl routine which was fantastic, I think I got some good photos of it second time round. The Swedish girl was also very energetic to some Disney music and the dogs were obviously enjoying themselves.

Eventually we had to have a walk to prevent my legs from seizing up! We wandered around the trade stands and had a little nose at the YKC people including one adorable little girl that attaches herself to Karen at HTM shows (lolz). In the evening we watched the best in breed, I say we, I spent most of the time chimping at photos on my camera as I was a little tired at this point!

I agreed with Karen's choice on who should win and we got 3/4 right (I think!) so that was fun. Then we had a mad dash to the train station and a fairly uneventful trip home. I even read a couple of papers so felt good about myself for doing work when I really didn't have to!

I slept really well last night and enjoyed my first (and certainly not last!) visit to Crufts!

Today I haven't done much, just a bit of course work, some of my Oxford application and written up a lecture. I still have well over 700 photos to edit from the past few weeks which are really starting to pile up behind my work unfortunately. If only my computer was faster. =P

I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately...

On the pros and cons of the future:

Do I want to do a masters? Yes

Pros

• I like learning stuff.
• I'd feel safer and under less pressure than a job.
• It would definitely only be for a year.

Cons

• It costs a lot.
• Would I be doing one for the sake of it?
• Am I too late to apply for one?
• Unsure of how much time and money I would have to come and visit Karen.
  

Do I want to get a job? Sort of.

Pros

• I would actually earn some money.
• I would be able to buy things with aforementioned money.
• It may possibly be easier to see Karen if I am not tied down to working a lot at home?
• Probably a good experience.

Cons

• Not sure I am ready for a job.
• Am scared of not being very good at it.
• I'd miss university life.

I'm not sure what to do, I feel like I have eggs and baskets everywhere.

I think I may have a crack at a couple of masters courses but look for jobs too to keep my options open for now.

It'll be ok, in fact its probably for the best, I just need time to adjust.

I'm very lucky to have people looking out for me.

And I'll take the first step of a million more...

-25 Facts-

1. I am a Christian and lead a Sunday school.
2. I have swam with tuna fish in the Red Sea.
3. I listen to a lot of music but would never describe myself as someone into it.
4. At various points in my life I have wanted to be: a farmer (tractors are cool), a sports journalist (sports are cool) and a linguist (linguists are cool). Currently I want to be (sort of am) a scientist (scientists are cool).
5. I have a strange obsession with being able to procrastinate and seem to be able to exhaust the internet of all its crappy flash games frequently.
6. I firmly believe that ice hockey is the best sport in the world.
   
7. I am rather accident prone and clumsy but have never broken a bone.
8. I feel happiest when I am outside (unless it is raining) taking photos and going on adventures with Karen.
9. I enjoy going on holiday to places with famous sporting arenas and pointing out that I have been to them once I return.
10. I hate spending money yet have very expensive tastes in, mostly pointless, gadgets.
11. I want to live abroad but haven't decided where, although Canada or the States would be a safe bet.
12. I have learned to like dogs and am rather excited about owning one in the future.
13. I got DNA and RNA mixed up in my Cambridge interview, pretty good show for a biologist really. =P
14. I have watched a shocklingly small number of films in my life.
15. I would like to make money from my photography but wouldn't want it to be a full blown career.
16. I own a ridiculous number of rucksacks (6 plus an extra camera bag).
17. I really like dark chocolate.
18. I think its much more fun to drive at night than in the day time.
19. I read far too many blogs and webcomics.
20. I like to cook and clean up afterwards!
21. For some reason I own three woolly hats.
22. I want to learn to ski and snowboard despite my abysmal sense of balance.
23. The most beautiful place I have ever been was the Sinai desert, seeing all the stars at night was fantastic. I also rode a camel, this was less fantastic.
24. I genuinely do want a pet minipig and would call it Jeremy.
25. I would still call Durham home but feel a very strong attachment to Sheffield and all the friends I have made in the past two and half years.
    
    
    
    I want to cheat and add a 26th thing.
    
    
26. I genuinely feel that I have met the love of my life and want to make the perfect proposal to spend the rest of my life with her. No matter what I am doing as long as I am doing it with her its the best thing in the world, it could be watching a sunset (we don't do sunrise =P) or watching the news, it doesn't matter.
    

The company you keep is what makes life worth living.

Love will come set me free, I do believe...

I almost feel like I am on top of work for once today, despite doing very little over the weekend. We had a fun time on Saturday at Varsity Ice Hockey with amazing hot dogs and a pretty good game. Then we met up with Chris and co for his birthday which had hilarious consequences as per usual. Although cocktails and shots are not the drinks of choice when leading a group of 7-9 year olds! We played cards and Karen and I won at poker, however I think Chris being inebriated and apathetic helped slightly. We then had a massive game of cheat which I won with minimal cheating and correct subversion of my general persona.

Karen thinks I use big words in the wrong context because my Dad is left handed and the language centre in the brain is in the left hand side (or something like that!). She's probably correct and I refuse to give up showing off my immense lexicon (see what I did there?).

Karen and I baked cakes on Saturday which was good fun and really cheered us both up I think. We need to do more baking I have decided. Whilst my waistline would suffer its a sacrifice I am willing to make! I even attempted to "beat" the mixture which I spectacularly failed at until some careful tuition from my hairy baker. ;)

Sunday was good fun despite the initial headache. The kids at church were incredibly well behaved and I think we really got through to them for once. I have a few weeks off now which I am looking forward to being in Church either in Sheffield or at home.

I get some peace and quiet tomorrow as Karen is going out for Katie's birthday. I am going to cook some amazing bacon sandwiches, maybe with egg, and edit some photos once I have finished my work. I may even watch a DVD if I am feeling daring!

Take on me, take me on...

Today has been tiring, after sleeping pretty badly on Sunday night and not catching up on sleep from Saturday. I had three lectures and got a couple written up so I am only 3 behind, hopefully I can get on top of it all by the end of the week. Then there is reading and dissertation to start worrying about. I may go to the IC tomorrow and have a think about it after lectures. I shot a hockey game tonight but didn't get (m)any decent shots because of noise, low shutter speeds, general ineptitude etc.

Kazz has been having house issues, which is upsetting but just makes me look forward to next year even more! It doesn't matter that we don't have a place to live yet but as long as we can live together then its fine!

We had a romantic meal on Friday for our anniversary; I had pizza and Karen had really tasty pasta bake! We then went to Buddha Bar which was really good! We did fall asleep as soon as we got home but ah well! =P

On Valentine's day we went to Opal to console Darielle and Ria, the ice cream and waffles certainly made me feel grateful that I was not single! I'd put on so much weight if I didn't have Karen to share food with. ;) We watched 100 greatest sex symbols until about 0130 which was hilarious, Tony Blair was up there at 57 which was probably the most calamatous but many of the comments and out-loud thoughts we had were priceless.

My parents and JB drove down yesterday and I finally sold my camera! Mum had a nice walk to Weston Park museum and Dad took Karen and I shopping. I bought loads of stuff which was well confusing as I didn't really need much. Ah well.

We had a nice chat in my room and then picked up Karen and ate at Aunt Sally's which was filling if not fantastic but it was just good to spend some time with my parents again. I am incredibley lucky to have them as they do such an awful lot for me! I wouldn't swap them. =P

We trekked up to The Place and had a quite evening hanging out with part of the biology crew. It was fun to hang out with Chris and Louisa alone for quite a while as we haven't really had chance to talk as couples (I'm so sad =S).

I am now trying in vain to remove as much noise as possible from my photos and see if I can get any sharp images to put online. Laterz.

The walls are built up stone by stone, the fields divided one by one...

It has been an awfully long time since I have blogged because of well, being away from my computer or not on my own to write my secrets down.

Today is 730 days since Karen and I became an item, in fact our anniversary is on Saturday (I'll never forget it ;). That's actually a genuinely terrifying statistic ;) I wouldn't swap a single one of them to be honest, and these past couple of weeks have been great. I think its so important and so incredible to have someone who will support you no matter what, no matter how down you feel they can always pick you up and when you're at your highest they will be there enjoying it with you. I am incredibly lucky and blessed to have had such an opportunity. I hope the last 730 days are an indicator of the next 73 years (my goodness that's a long time!).

We had a great few days at the end of exams last week, it snowwed a lot in Sheffield which was fun for us but not so for people with cars! Karen and I spent many an evening watching cars struggle up Crookesmoor road which was the least gritted road in all of Sheffield (or so it seemed!). We walked out through all the parks into the peaks and saw a teeny tiny bird and some photogenic sheep.

Later that week we walked from Hathersage to Stanage Edge and down to Lodge moor where I took more photos (of sheep!). We went with Chris and it was refreshing to know that his photographic technique is almost as lassaiz faire as mine! I got some pretty good shots and some lovely mono conversions which Karen doesn't like because the sky was a gorgeous blue colour!

Tonight I am going to Cell at Abi's which will be good as there is food! Tomorrow I shall go to the gym to polish my guns (rofl) and make sure I am really sexy for our anniversary meal that evening. I do enjoy a good pizza but may branch out to pasta for one evening only!

Karen is ill the poor little thing, I really hope she gets better soon as I don't like seeing her like this all the time. I can't wait to give her the present I bought her, I hope it arrives super soon!

There must be a guardian angel, or some kind of destiny we have...

I have been a busy revision bee hence my lack of blogging. I am currently half way through my (two) exams. I finish on Monday and cannot wait! Molecular ecology went as expected, not great but good enough. Hopefully I will have a good mark to improve on my coursework mark. Monday is ethics which on first impressions was far too deep for little me and my unphilosophical nature. However the concepts we are talking about are actually interesting! Woe is me. =P

Karen insisted that we went for a walk up to Bole Hill on Thursday to escape from revision for a bit. It was a definite Godsend and it was wonderful to just be outside for an extended length of time. I got to play with my camera on the tripod a bit. I was surprised how stable it is considering I got it from Jessops for 12.50. I shall be looking at my shots in a bit and may even post one! I really wished we had set up for a shot of us doing the Titanic pose on a picnic bench overlooking the North-east of Sheffield. Hopefully we shall get another chance to do it!

Tomorrow is going to be terrifying! Apparently we could have up to 50% more children than usual. I can't deal with 8 never mind 12!!!!!! Muchos prayer shall be occurring. I think I am secretly looking forward to it as I want to do some fun drama and play more games to keep the little darlings entertained.

I've been feeling incredibley close to Kazz recently (yes even more so!), a lot of talkings of engagement, weddings, dogs and babies has occurred. Normally this should make a man run away and hide in a shed with some tools and a project however I do not own a shed so this has been impossible! Yet that response hasn't even threatened to be elicited in me, hence I am thinking this is a bit of a hint that we're pretty serious. =)

I made an exciting pasta bake thing with a tomatoey cheesey sauce which was pretty damn nice! I think I shall take a walk to Tesco once I have finished exams to get a lasagne and maybe a canneloni if I am feeling frivilous. A new Nisa has opened literally 2 minutes from my house which is very exciting for all! The prospect of incredibley cheap wine and suspect looking cheese warms the cockles of my heart.

Time for photo editing!

I was feeling free...

I have (almost!!!) finished by project. Hurrah!!

However this is not the most exciting piece of news this week; Karen got her offer from Hallam on Tuesday which is immense. I am so unbelievably proud of her, not just for getting the offer but for being so determined. I don't think I have stopped smiling since. =)

Nothing much has been happening apart from that really. We looked at engagement rings and I would love to get something from here as I think they'd be bound to do something unique enough for Karen's beautiful hands. We shall have to wait and see. =)

Tomorrow I bake cheesey pasta bake for the first time which I am rather excited about! I may even take photos! Karen is buying wine and ice cream for our tasty tasty meal too. I can't wait. Then we can revise with wine! Can life get any better. ^_^

Carry this picture for luck, tucked in your pocket...

Today has been manic then depressive (Oh I am witty =S). Boulders was crazy this morning I can't believe how hyper and thus noise and badly behaved the kids were. Hopefully it is down to still being on a sugar high after Christmas and won't last. Although I did have suggestions that it was to do with the wind (weird or what?).

This afternoon and evening have been a more sedate (boring!) affair with my project inching towards conclusion although I still have a lot to do. I simply must get it finished by the weekend as I really really don't want to be still working on Monday afternoon.

I can't wait to get that first exam and project hand in over and done with then its only one more exam and a viva before the whole slog starts again except I have cleverly given myself three lecture modules in 2A. Hopefully my interest won't be my undoing.

I am really itching to get out and take photos despite it being incredibly windy today! I also love my new hat! Its super warm and I think I look amazing. If I am feeling frivolous I may even post a picture! I should probably start a photo a day album on my pbase at some point as I have heard so many people say they improve their photography; once exams are over I think I shall do that!

Karen get's back to Sheffield tomorrow so I am looking forward to just hanging out with her again. People keep asking when we are going to get married! I don't deal well with pressure but I feel warm and fuzzy that people think we should! =P

These photographs keep me alive...

Today has been rather bleh. Haven't done much just pottered around and tried to get on with my project. I concentrated so poorly this afternoon and evening its unbelievable. Rather annoyed at myself actually.

Here is a photo of my poor bandaged finger in A & E. I'm still covered in plasters but its not been as painful today and I have learnt never to let Karen leave otherwise bad things happen!


I am in bed again just relaxing as its a Saturday night. Hoping that Boulders goes well tomorrow and that my discussion will possibly get finished. It really really should. I wish the silly internet wasn't so distracting. :(

Karen is away having fun with old people at a dog show! Apparently they have been asking about me so I am a bit scared, tehe. I hope I pass the test. ;)

Everybody hurts, everybody cries...

So its been a hectic few days since returning to Sheffield. After an expensive shop, a nerve wracking interview and much revision I finally had Thursday night had to be alone and go to bed super early ready to get up and push on with my project which hadn't moved for several weeks. I had eaten a tasty lasgne with my dodgy homemade garlic bread (fried bread with garlic - too much effort really =P) and was in the kitchen clearing up before making a tasty tasty hot chocolate and I managed to smash a glass causing a fairly deep cut on my right hand ring finger below the first knuckle. It was bleeding quiet profusely and I was nauseous because I am a wimp so I rang my medical advisor! What would we do without medical students!

Fortunately I was given a lift to a & e and looked after whilst I was there. It was really good to catch up actually and talk about several random things including why does Sprite have 4x the calories of diet coke, when I was going to get engaged, and my fastidious planning for the trip to Morocco! Anyway we were stuck there until just after midnight and all I have to show for it is a plaster. I hate stitches but at least that would have been more impressive, I could've gone to Boots for goodness sake. Hmph to my overactive circulatory system.

I am now sat in bed having a had a bleh day. I am feeling a bit alone because Karen isn't in Sheffield or near a computer, so I am really looking forward to seeing her on Monday lunchtime. My new camera bag and monopod arrived earlier and I have so far concluded that the bag is perfect and the monopod would make an awesome sword/lightsabre/eye-pokin-out-device. If I am feeling bored I may wander to Goodwin tomorrow and see if there is any hockey on to shoot for a bit.

I should have planned for Boulders tonight but its totally slipped my mind. Were doing about "When I met Jesus" so I have to think of when I did meet Jesus! Its not as easy as I imagined. I guess I have always felt watched over and seen prayers answered (exam results, university placings, being accepted, being fancied, being loved...) which isn't as dramatic as one single event but having brought me this far in life I am not going to give up on it now.

I also found this video, its absolutely brilliant! I want to immitate this so badly!

I like you so much better when you're naked...

My first post of 2009 and start of the second calender year of blogging. How exciting!

I am now back in Sheffield and attempting to hurry on with my project and do some of that pesky revision, whilst trying to keep in constant contact with Karen, run a Sunday school and advance my photography. At least I have enough to keep busy.

The past two weeks have been great, really relaxing and I don't feel like I am too far behind with work either. I spent a few days at home when Karen came to visit and we did the typical studenty things, slept lots, ate lots, played on the wii and went to a garden centre (=S). Then we drove all the way to Preston to spend New Year's Eve there. It was a stark contrast to last year, when we spent it with some drunk Australians on the Charle's bridge in Prague! But by staying in we got to keep warm and watch lots of Planet Earth, which I think is Karen's best Christmas present if I don't say so myself. =P

On the 30th we met up with Karen's girl friends from School which was less nerve wracking than I made out to be. We had tapas and the food was good if not a bit expensive. I now officially have to say I like Chinese as much of this food was consumed on the 2nd but it was tasty tasty and I felt very stuffed afterwards! Kazz and I took Chippa to the beach for a run and I got to play with the faster frame rate on my D300 which is going to be so useful for sport once I get the hang of the autofocus system. I have taken just over 900 photos in two weeks which I am rather impressed (shocked!) with. Sadly this rate of photographising will diminish due to revision but I have two weeks after exams with only my viva thing to worry about so I will be making the most of getting out and getting more practice!

Karen has her PGCE interview tomorrow which is both exciting and scary. I am really very proud of her for being confident enough to do it! Seeing how keen she is to succeed and how much enjoyment it brings is great. I am going to write my prayer diary now and head over for some final interview prep. =D